Can we just be honest about something for a second here?
Sometimes, I can be horribly, horribly jealous of friendships. Or if not jealous, maybe than just pessimistic about friendships. See, ever since I wrote about these little shenanigans, there have been some other developments, if you will. I sent a letter and got no response. I heard some updates through the grapevine, and Facebook stalking (no judgment!). And while yes, there are plenty of friends in my life, I’ve felt a little bummed out in the friendship department with the loss of some of my closest friendships this year.
I am not going to lie: I get jealous of what other people seem to have in their friendships. A bunch of bloggers met up in Vegas—they’ve formed amazing friendships, and I’ve never really met anyone I blog with. BlogHer was this past weekend, and I didn’t go, therefore missing out on meeting a lot of other bloggers—and let’s be real, a ton of free swag that sounded freaking awesome. Reading the tweets of people meeting up, seeing that people I love and admire online were meeting one another and drinking together and I was here watching endless Gilmore Girls and doing nothing and AHHHHH! Friendships in real life can be difficult, too—with my closest friends scattered all over the country, work schedules, school schedules, weddings, babies, and general growing apart, it can seem pretty lonely.
But something shifted for me yesterday.
Yesterday, morning, I had the chance to pick my friend Jamie up at the airport. Jamie and I met nearly six years ago when she moved to Sacramento, before moving back to her hometown of Portland. She recently returned from spending a year living in Chile and Argentina, and had an amazing experience. One of my favorite things about Jamie is that she is deep—meaning that our conversations always delve beneath surface catching up, and into “real” life. We got some coffee and had some good conversation. It was so nice to catch up and talk about life with someone who’s been around for many of the seasons of my life.
Last night, I met up with my old friend Stacy for a drink. Stacy and I met in college and were extremely close friends for a long time. We used to take walks, enjoy frozen yogurt, eat ice cream, read magazines and drink endless coffee together. Stacy and her husband moved to Seattle a few years ago, and we slowly grew apart. We reunited last night, and had the best time. Everything fell into place again and it felt like old times. It was so great to chat and laugh and have girl talk with my old friend.
As I drove home last night, with my sunroof open and my music up, I felt so, so grateful. Sure, I may not have gone to BlogHer, and I may not have done the Vegas Meet-Up, and people I valued and loved may have moved forward, but I am so damn lucky. So lucky. My friends are scattered around the country, but they are there. I come home every night to a guy who loves me, and who I adore; I have an amazing family who never fails me.
Sometimes, it’s nice to remember just how blessed I am.